I was talking to an author during lunch today who subs at our school from time to time. At one point, we had the following conversation:
Her: "So let me get this straight. You're a full time teacher here?"
Me: "Yes."
Her: "And you have two kids?"
Me: "Yes."
Her: (Long pause) "When the heck do you have time to write?"
Me: Well I'm not really a 'good' mom, per say...
At this point my fellow coworker Brad shouts across the lunch room, "Oh, come on! Every time I see your kids out on the street holding up their 'Will work for food' signs, I'm impressed by their work ethic."
Thanks for that, Brad.
In other kid-related news, I realized that I call everyone in my household "baby." Trin will hand me my thermos of iced-coffee and I'll say "Thanks baby." Clint will come home from work and I'm all "Hey baby." And so on. The problem is when you call everyone baby, they all respond. No one is sure which "baby" is your target audience. So I told the kids tonight, "I need new pet names for you guys. What do you want me to call you?"
"Sexy Taco," Trinity blurts out. Without even batting an eye.
And this is why you don't let your kids choose their own nicknames.
The publishing mayhem is just about over, and I almost have what sort of resembles a life again! YES. I'm sighing with relief so hard that I'm getting lightheaded.
I was just about to send you an email asking you how the finishing touches were coming along. So close now! ^_^
ReplyDeleteSexy Taco. Lol! Although, Taco by itself is really cute. I call my brother "Brother." On the flip side, I call ALL cats, "Pumpkin." If I ever have two cats again, I need to remember this post and call one Pumpkin and one something else. But really, when it comes to cats, just talking out loud makes them think you're talking to them anyway, because after all, who else could we possibly be talking to in the world according to the cat?
Really though, I'm sure you're a great mom. Kids only need attention until you can trust them not to stick forks in the socket. ;)
I love "Taco"--I'm totally going to call her that.
ReplyDeleteI have a huge rabbit (she's a flemish giant) named Pumpkin. So your cat-nickname-tendencies would be very confusing for my bunny. LOL. And yes, cats always think (nay, KNOW) that you're talking to them!
Thanks for saying that my shoddy parenting still qualifies me as a good mom!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... Sexy Taco. That is awesome.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with that sub/writer's assessment, it's pretty awesome that you make time for your family, students/job, and writing. I've met your kids, you are so a good mom!
I call Matt "babe," but there's no one else around for me to nick-name, so it's just him. I do find that I call strangers or acquaintances "hon" or "sweetie" sometimes. That's how I know I've been living in the South too long. When it becomes appropriate, or at least doesn't feel strange, to give strangers pet names it's time to move.
Aww, thanks Kristyn for your kind words about my parenting!
DeleteI call all of my students sweetie and honey. I think I picked it up from Mrs. French. Did you have her in 11th grade? She used to call all of us dumpling and sugar pie. Thinking back, I wonder if it's because she just never memorized our names. Either way, it was pretty endearing.
"When it...doesn't feel strange to give strangers pet names it's time to move." Haha! That might be a sign.
I choose some boring pet names. Maybe I should have asked my family what to call them. Probably couldn't be worse than those I picked.
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear I'm not the only "not a 'good' parent per say" around here.
Glad you're barreling back toward having a life
Boring pet names Eric? Ha! I doubt that.
DeleteBut seriously, don't ask your family what to call them. At least not your kids, lest you end up with sexy taco or busty burrito or something worse. Okay, your toddler probably won't blurt out 'busty burrito,' but why chance it?
I'd try to offer your solace about your parenting skills, but I really don't know. You could very well suck. ;)
So, I commented on this in the middle of the night while I was feeding a baby... but apparently, blogger hates me. :(
ReplyDeleteSexy Taco!!! You tell Trin that is awesome. Except that you'd have to shorten it to Taco, because no one should call their daughter Sexy... *shivers*
I'm pretty lame with pet names... (babe, baby, sweetie), but my hubs rocks. He typically calls me Sugar, Sugar Pie or some variation. But when he's really playful, it's Frou Frou Kitten or Boo Boo Kitty F*** (10 points if you know where that comes from!!!).
I'm selfishly thrilled that you are done. Both because I CAN'T WAIT TO OWN THIS BOOK!!! And, because you might have extra time to chat. You know, with crazy friends who might email you inappropriate comments about a package you are waiting for!! :P lol
I would bet $1000 that your kids would argue about you being a good mom, btw. You're a great mom. <3
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back!! Winner winner chicken dinner!!
DeleteDang it Jewls, you stole my ten points! (Okay, not really, I had no idea...should I be worried that you knew that?) ;)
DeleteOnly because it's a super funny movies and you haven't seen it, sheltered child ;)
DeleteAwesome, Jewls!!!! I love that movie, but I actually think that one is from Dogma! That's what Jay calls the girl who is Jesus' relative.
DeleteMaybe it's in Jay and Silent Bob too...
http://youtu.be/8Y7v5xL3Zv4
DeleteBlogger hates me too Mel. I have to copy my comment every single time, just in case it dumps it, which happens about 50% of the time.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I agree, there is NO WAY I'm calling my daughter sexy!
I'm really lame with pet names too. Honey, sweetie, and baby are about all I've got. I LOVE your hubby's names for you. Maybe guys are just better at this? Clint has some interesting ones for me. They change over time too. I might be Jujubee one week and Sparkle Buns the next.
I can't wait for you to own my book too! (Wait--is that super self-absorbed? Oh well, I still can't wait!). And crazy friends who e-mail inappropriate comments about paddle-shaped--ehem!--I mean pan-shaped packages that they are waiting for...I can't imagine WHO you are referring to. ;)
Thanks for giving me the benefit of the doubt about my parenting. Although I'm thinking I should take your bet because I could really use a thousand bucks.
I'll bet you, but if it looks like I'm losing, I'm using that $1k to bribe your brats into saying your a good mom!!! Lol!
DeleteIt's taken six tries to get this published...
Haha! You'd be a total sucker then because they's totally do it for two bucks.
Delete(And I HATE BLOGGER. But Wordpress wants to charge me for everything. Not sure what to do. Advice?)